My life is and has been an amazing grace. I did not always feel that way. It has taken a long time for me to get here, and to feel the way I do. I had to learn and grow inside and out, and I needed the time and distance from my beginning, to give my self a chance to reflect upon my journey. As we all do. Yet when I was going through the difficult times it was hard to remember, I was not alone and I was loved. When you are suffering, it is hard to see, this too shall pass, there will be an end, and there will be a light at the end of the tunnel. I forget how strong I really am, and how resilient I have been.
Now I see that life itself is an amazing grace. I can’t imagine any of us could get through one day of our life without the grace of The Eternal God. The song “Amazing Grace” speaks of a lost soul finding redemption in his life. This has been sung in many languages. Many of us have identified with the lyrics of the song, as I have too. Now I know that God’s grace has been with me, always watching over me, watching over all of us even when we feel and think we are lost. As I see it now. I was never lost, I was never forgotten, I just thought I was.
There was a long time in my life, I wasn’t sure I would ever find my way home, and, if I did, would He ever love me, would I be worthy of that love? Perhaps, that was the question that lay deep inside of me … Was I worth it? Maybe all of us asked this question one time or other in our lifetime. Fear of rejection, and feeling maybe I wasn’t worth it.
That question never needed to be asked. This I know now. We are all his children, we are part of Him. We have broken His heart at times; we may make mayhem of our lives, causing deep sorrows in His heart. Yet His heart and arms are always open to embrace us. That is what I have learned. The light was always on and the door was always open to my Father’s House. I just need to reach for it and ask and to remember I was part of His creation. When I lost all hope in my self, He kept the faith in me. He kept the door open, He kept the light on so I could find my way back. He received me with open arms and embraced me so tenderly!
Amazing grace, Amazing grace! How sweet thou are!
Mi Sun Donahue
May 14, 2010